Cold coolin' at a bar

and I'm looking for

some action

But like Mike Jagger said

I can't get no satisfaction

The girls are all around

but none of them

want to get with me

My threads are fresh

and I'm lookin def

yo, what's up with L-O-C?

The girls I saw jockin

at the other end

of the bar

Havin' drinks

with some

no name chump

when they know

that I'm the star

So I got up and

strolled over

to the other side

of the cantina

I asked the guy

why you so fly?

he said

Funky Cold Medina

Funky Cold Medina

This brother told me

a secret on how to

get more chicks

Put a little Medina

in your glass

and the girls will

come real quick

It's better than any

alcohol or aphrodisiac

A couple of sips

of this love potion

and she'll be on your lap

So I gave some

to my dog

when he began to beg

Then he licked his bowl

and he looked at me

and did the wild thing

on my leg

He used to scratch

and bite me

before he was much

much meaner

But now all the poodles

run to my house

for Funky Cold Medina

You know what I'm sayin?

I got every dog

in my neighbourhood

breaking down my door

I got Spuds' McKenzie

Alex from Stroh's

they won't leave my dog

alone with that Medina,

pal

I went up to this girl

she said hi my name

is Sheena

I thought she'd be good

to go with a little

Funky Cold Medina

She said I'd like a drink

I said okay I'd go get it

then a couple sips

she cold licked her lips

And I knew that

she was with it

So I took her to my crib

and everything went

well as planned

But when she got

undressed

it was a big old mess

Sheena was a man

So I threw him out

I don't fool around with no

Oscar Meyer Weiner

You must be sure

that your girl is pure

for the Funky Cold Medina

You know

ain't no playing

with a man

This is the eighties

and I'm down

with the ladies

Break it down

Back in the saddle

lookin' for a little affection

I took a shot

as a contestant

on the Love Connection

The audience voted

and you know

they picked a winner

I took my date

to the Hilton for Medina

and some dinner

She had a few drinks

I'm thinkin' soon

what I'll be gettin'

Instead she started talking

'bout plans

for a wedding

So wait slow down

love not so fast

I'll be seeing ya

That's why I found

you don't play around

with the

Funky Cold Medina

You know what

I'm saying that

Medina is a monster y'all

Funky Cold Medina