25 excuses people use to avoid doing karaoke
You name it, we’ve heard it. Ironically, it is all of these 'excuse people' that end up hogging the mic all night. You know the types of humans - say they're not hungry and order just a drink but eat all of your delicious chips. So rest assured if anyone throws any elaborate reason at you that they do not wish to participate in karaoke - make them anyway. Two songs in and we're pretty sure they'll be acting like Beyonce on tour.
1. I’m tone deaf. Seriously, doctor told me.
2. I don’t believe in the freedom of speech or song.
3. My voice is so good if I sung I’d make you all cry, and I can’t have that on my conscience.
4. My cat is sick. She vommed onto the karaoke kit and everything. Mic is now an off shade of yellow.
5. I moonlight as a global popstar so, to be honest, I need a night off.
6. I injured both of my hands in a freak coffee spill incident and therefore cannot hold a mic.
7. I've run out of teabags and the shops are shut and no-one can possibly sing karaoke at home without a cuppa.
8. I thought I was a rockstar last night so chucked the laptop, TV and speakers out of the window.
9. I got turned down once for X Factor and I've never recovered from the rejection.
10. My vocal coach explained that I must rest my chords at all times if I want to reach stardom before I’m 70.
11. I'd love to come over and attend your karaoke night. Except my car broke and my legs broke and my keys broke.
12. My dog chewed my ponytail off and now I’m in post traumatic hair recovery.
13. I've sold my house to go live in Nepal with the goats.
14. This pigeon flew over my head earlier, pooed in my mouth and it stuck my lips together.
15. I have no friends that aren't imaginary and cannot sing alone. They all agree with me.
16. I am a hermit. Officially, as from 9am today.
17. I tried to talk this morning but I have become a mute.
18. I have an addictive personality and had to give up karaoke last year due to singing uncontrollably in a public cubicle.
19. You know Katy Perry? Her last world tour? Well I was the sound-check person. So really karaoke is beneath me.
20. When I sing I smash windows with my falsetto. So I’m banned from singing at friend's houses.
21. Singing karaoke makes me accidentally wet my pants. Every. Damn. Time.
22. I so would come but, you know, work's just sent me on a last minute trip to Tortuga.
23. Funny story, actually, so this snake came in through the dog flap...
24. If I ever sing in public you'll realise I am Britney Spears' voice-over and I signed a NDA with her back in 1995.
25. If I tell you why I can’t do karaoke, I’d have to kill you. MI5 orders I’m afraid.
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